Day 7 - Appreciation

Here I am with my dinner last night - before I juiced it.  Look at the size of that bowl of vegetables!.  No wonder sometimes people call this a juice feast instead of a juice fast. 

Today, on day 7 of 10, I can finally say that I felt hungry at times.  Maybe a better way to say it is that today I became aware of the emptiness of my stomach.  This is not a feeling I usually allow my body to have.  So it wasn't like I was craving any particular foods - as in, "Oh a pizza would taste so good right now!"  This was different.  I just recognized hunger in my body.  When I felt it and thought about what I was hungry for, my next fresh juice actually seemed like a very appealling option.  Or maybe some vegetable soup with beans.  This was not just a craving.  That's what my "hunger" usually is.  Usually I crave things that taste good (and greasy and sweet or salty) and name that craving hunger.    Like I said, this was different.   This was my body simply asking me to give it nutrition.  To give it what it needs - not just craving what my mind wants.  Because my body and I experienced a lack of food it seemed like my fast really began today. 

But that lack of certain things has created a deeper appreciation within me of certain other things.  Like the smell of my fruits and vegetables. I juice each type of vegetable one at a time, so I can breathe in the the fresh cucumber smell, then the fresh lemon smell, then the fresh tomato smell. They don't just smell good to me. They smell absolutely delicious to me. Generally I eat so fast I don't take the time to smell my food at all, let alone notice the exquisite and abundant smell and taste of one simple unsalted, unseasoned ingredient.   Then there's certainly the keen awareness of and appreciation for the overabundance of food I usually have available to me.  A fast is a time of hunger with an endpoint for me.  There are hungry people all over the world who aren't fasting on purpose, and don't have plenty of food waiting for them on Tuesday like I do.

These are important things for me to remember.  I hope that the fullness of appreciation that the lack of food has given me will not be overtaken by overeating as soon my fast is over.

Day 5 - Mind and Body

When I woke up on day three of this juice fast two days ago, I was not sure I could keep going.  I felt hungry and had many thoughts about the good foods I would like to have that day.  But then I reminded myself that it was not like I was never going to eat again - that it is only 10 days out of my month and soon enough I would be eating all kinds of things again.  The funny thing is, as soon as my brain accepted this fact, I was immediately fine and did not feel hungry.

What is it about our brains that tell us lies?  Lies like, "I'm not going to be able to do this."  Our brains have a lot of power over how our bodies feel.  The most interesting thing about this fast for me is how clearly and keenly I'm noticing my body/mind connection.  And it's not only how my brain affects how I feel in my body - it's also how my fasting body affects my mind.  I find my memory is much sharper, my thinking much clearer and my focus much more sustained this week.  It is as if all the food that I usually stuff into my not really that hungry body robs some of the energy I need to function mentally, diverting it into having to digest all the time.  Without having to digest more than juice, my brain gets more blood flow and energy, and therefore certainly more clarity.  It makes me realize that smaller portions and eating less often is important not just for my waistline but also for my brain.

This morning I embark on Day 5.  Wow!  Almost half way through.  I went out to breakfast with my colleagues, which is my weekly habit.  I brought my juice along and happily drank it while they had their eggs and oatmeal.  I feel good enough from my fasting not to crave the food now.  In fact, my brain registered how different I would feel if I were eating my usual pile of eggs and potatoes and I fekt grateful for the lighter feeling I have today.  I also noticed how I had more time to really listen to my friends and have a conversation because I didn't have to get any eating done.  That is one very concrete and simple example of how fasting has taken something out of the way to leave room for something new.  Another example - yesterday I got a whole lot of stuff done because I didn't have to think about what I was going to make, prepare meals or stop to eat a meal.  (With thanks to my husband, who fed the boys!)  I was amazed how much longer the day felt.

What I'm also now wondering about, however, is the choices I am making about how to use my extra time, space and energy.  I have a propensity to fill my time with lots of work.  Yes, there is a lot to get accomplished as fall approaches, but I want to make sure to leave some room during this fast - which really is a special time - for some extra down time, too.  Some prayer time.  Some quiet time.  Some serious listening time.  Ultimately, I think that's what this fast is for me - a time to listen better - to God, my body and myself.   It gives me a rare opportunity for deeper awareness - an opportunity that is often hard to find in life.  The fast is giving me the room I need to notice more deeply than usual who I really am, for in my emptiness, I find I am not alone.  Usually, I'm too busy menu planning, grocery shopping, cooking, eating or digesting to have the room to notice some of these very important things each day. 

A New Twist on an Old Practice

Fasting is an ancient practice.   It has been a part of the Christian tradition since before John the Baptist pointed his finger heavenward and started yelling, "Prepare Ye the Way of the Lord."  Jesus himself fasted for 40 days in the wilderness and often went off alone to fast and pray throughout his ministry.  Fasting has been a part of every major religion - and most minor ones too.  In fact, since August 1 and until the 30th,  faithful Moslems are currently observing the month of Ramadan, in which they have no food and no water at all until the sun goes down each day.   Islam is one faith that hasn't let the practice of fasting fall by the wayside!  I have fasted for a day here and there - often on Good Friday, but I've never really done a prolonged fast, even though I know darn well that they are extremely good for one's physical, mental and spiritual health.

On Thursday, I saw the movie  "Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead" for the second time.  If you haven't seen this wonderful documentary, I heartily recommend it.  It is the story of an Australian fellow named Joe Cross who decided to take his life back by getting healthier.  The way he does it is to embark on an extended journey across America while also embarking on an extended juice fast.  It's the kind of fast in which the only thing you take in besides water is freshly juiced fruits and vegetables (not prepared juice - you have to make it fresh in a juicer).  So it's not a complete Ghandi-like fast.  You are actually taking in some really good nutrition.  But it's very simple nutrition from veggies and fruits - and no chewing is involved.   You are definitely fasting from eating as we normally know it.

The central message of the movie is that the way to change the world is to change yourself.  And it conveys, in a variety of ways, how as people invite more wellness into their lives, they not only get better themselves, but also invite healing into their communities.  I particularly liked that theme, because this is just what what seems to be emerging here at Grace Church.  We are working toward becoming a gathering place for healing and wellness - not just for our own church members - but for the entire Trumbull community.  We're planning all kinds of events having to do with nutrition, exercise, stress reduction, spiritual practices, etc. in the coming year.  We hope God's healing and wholeness will start here and then move outward from our church like ripples on a pond.

So, I found the movie very uplifting and inspiring.  The first time I saw it, I was inspired by Joe's story.  But the second time I saw it (last Thursday), I was inspired to start a juice fast myself.  Though I've always known - at least with my head - that fasting is an important spiritual discipline, I guess it took this movie to get me to actually DO one.  I guess sometimes God speaks through unlikely channels - even movies with funny names.

So today is the second day of my own 10 day juice fast. As expected, yesterday I had some detox symptoms - fatigue, headache and irritability. I was just darn hungry by the time 4 pm came around.  I faded fast in the evening and went to bed around 7:30 and slept right through until 6:30 this morning.    Some people get some pretty serious detox symptoms for up to 3 days when they do a fast, but I guess I was lucky. Today is my second day, and I feel pretty darn good, my hunger is less bothersome and I am feeling quite satisfied by the juice.  I've been making fruit juices in the morning (this morning I juiced fresh watermelon, cherries, limes and cucumbers.  Delicious!)  and I've had vegetable juices for the rest of the day (yesterday I made a whammo juice with tomatoes, chard, celery and hot peppers - very bracing.)

Why am I doing this?  Well, I have a lot coming up this fall, and I thought it would be a good idea to be at my best - to be clearer and cleaner - to do a "reboot" as they say in the movie. I'm also doing it to lose the 10 -15 pounds I've gained since moving to Trumbull two years ago.  But I think the most important reason is that I'm approaching this as a spiritual discipline.  I'm doing it to empty myself out - like cleaning out a messy closet - so that God can reorder my insides, and fill me with the good things that I haven't been leaving any room for.  I know it'll be a challenge, but I also hope it'll be a great experience.  I'll keep reporting how it's going this week. If all goes as planned, I'll be juice fasting until some time on Monday the 29th. 

 In the meantime, talk to me if you'd like to see the movie - I've got it at my house and I'm happy to watch it again anytime!  Also, let me know if you're interested in doing a juice fast yourself.  I'm happy to help in any way I can.  Let's heal together.