Day 5 - Mind and Body

When I woke up on day three of this juice fast two days ago, I was not sure I could keep going.  I felt hungry and had many thoughts about the good foods I would like to have that day.  But then I reminded myself that it was not like I was never going to eat again - that it is only 10 days out of my month and soon enough I would be eating all kinds of things again.  The funny thing is, as soon as my brain accepted this fact, I was immediately fine and did not feel hungry.

What is it about our brains that tell us lies?  Lies like, "I'm not going to be able to do this."  Our brains have a lot of power over how our bodies feel.  The most interesting thing about this fast for me is how clearly and keenly I'm noticing my body/mind connection.  And it's not only how my brain affects how I feel in my body - it's also how my fasting body affects my mind.  I find my memory is much sharper, my thinking much clearer and my focus much more sustained this week.  It is as if all the food that I usually stuff into my not really that hungry body robs some of the energy I need to function mentally, diverting it into having to digest all the time.  Without having to digest more than juice, my brain gets more blood flow and energy, and therefore certainly more clarity.  It makes me realize that smaller portions and eating less often is important not just for my waistline but also for my brain.

This morning I embark on Day 5.  Wow!  Almost half way through.  I went out to breakfast with my colleagues, which is my weekly habit.  I brought my juice along and happily drank it while they had their eggs and oatmeal.  I feel good enough from my fasting not to crave the food now.  In fact, my brain registered how different I would feel if I were eating my usual pile of eggs and potatoes and I fekt grateful for the lighter feeling I have today.  I also noticed how I had more time to really listen to my friends and have a conversation because I didn't have to get any eating done.  That is one very concrete and simple example of how fasting has taken something out of the way to leave room for something new.  Another example - yesterday I got a whole lot of stuff done because I didn't have to think about what I was going to make, prepare meals or stop to eat a meal.  (With thanks to my husband, who fed the boys!)  I was amazed how much longer the day felt.

What I'm also now wondering about, however, is the choices I am making about how to use my extra time, space and energy.  I have a propensity to fill my time with lots of work.  Yes, there is a lot to get accomplished as fall approaches, but I want to make sure to leave some room during this fast - which really is a special time - for some extra down time, too.  Some prayer time.  Some quiet time.  Some serious listening time.  Ultimately, I think that's what this fast is for me - a time to listen better - to God, my body and myself.   It gives me a rare opportunity for deeper awareness - an opportunity that is often hard to find in life.  The fast is giving me the room I need to notice more deeply than usual who I really am, for in my emptiness, I find I am not alone.  Usually, I'm too busy menu planning, grocery shopping, cooking, eating or digesting to have the room to notice some of these very important things each day.