Seeing Myself as Others See Me

So, just recently we started videotaping our sermons and posting them on the website.  This is a good thing, but I've got to adjust to having myself projected on the small screen.  I remember, as a kid, hearing my tape recorded voice for the first time and being amazed at how different my voice sounded from the way I heard it inside my own head.  "Is that really how I sound?" I asked incredulously.  Sure - of course - was the answer.  Wow, I didn't soud at all like I think I sounded.

This discomfort has now all been taken up a notch for me with these videos.  Do I really look like that?  That is not how I picture myself in my own head.  Do I really blink that much?  Is my voice really that sharp?  Are my nose and teeth really that big?  And for that matter, is my neck really that scrawny? 

Some people look in the mirror and see nothing but flaws and imperfections - even magnifying them and imagining them larger and more pronounced than they really are. 

Some people look in the mirror and overlook their flaws - moving into a place of denial about what they could improve. 

What I would like to do is to look at the mirror (or at the videos) and embrace what I see with love, not magnifying my flaws or ignoring my shortcomings.  Despite my own initial negative reaction, I need to remind myself that everyone who has met me sees me the way I look on the videos.  No one thinks there's anything "wrong" with how I look or sound.  It's just how I look and sound!  Since so far no one has run screaming, so I guess it must not be all that bad.  I am simply an average bear.  Oh bother.  I guess this is just another thing to put in the God box!

O God, by whom the meek are guided in judgment, and light rises up in darkness for the godly: Grant us, in all our doubts and uncertainties, the grace to ask what you would have us do, that the Spirit of wisdom may save us from all false choices, and that in your light we may see light, and in your straight path may not stumble; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.