Lenten Thoughts - Week 3

As I listen to the dryer and the furnace humming below me in the cellar, I am reminded of just how many noises surround me everyday. Some are comforting, like the calm snoring of my dog, and some are annoying, like the repetitive music from a computer game. Many sounds are so familiar to me, I don't even hear them anymore. But when I really stop to listen, I begin to notice how noisy my life really is.

This week I took a break from all my usual noises and went on a silent retreat. The only time I used my voice was when I was in the chapel praying or singing. There was no one with me, so I didn't hear anyone else's voice either. I had no music, and didn't watch TV. It was pretty darn quiet! And the place where I was staying was really quiet, too. Camp Washington is the diocesan camp and retreat center here in Connecticut, and it's off the beaten path. Every now and then a car drives by, or you hear an airplane fly over, but when I went out to take a walk, all I heard was the woods. I heard no highways or roads in the distance - no motor sounds at all. That is very unusual for this region. At night, it was pitch dark, and there was not another soul at the camp but me. I stayed in the Transfiguration Lodge, a beautiful building with its own beautiful chapel. There are beds for six in there, but only mine was taken. Like I said, it was pretty quiet.

With all that silence, I found that I began to hear the noises inside me that are usually drowned out by the noises all around me. Silence tends to do that. It tends to allow stuff to bubble up and be noticed. It gave me the chance to feel, to acknowledge and to pray about things I hadn't made the room for lately. It slowed me down and woke me up at the same time. I had a few good cries, three great nights of sleep and lots of relaxing time by the wood stove, listening to the crackle of the burning logs. I took focussed time with all four daily offices each day, with the Rule of St. Benedict and some Al Anon literature. I also took long, quiet walks and wrote pages and pages of stuff in my journal. All of these things are ways I've found to be in conversation with God. God and I had some real quality time together this week.

During Lent, we've been putting more periods of silence into our worship services at Grace Church. I tell everyone that in this noisy world, Lent is an important time to make some room in our busy lives for for more silence. And it is. The silence wants to talk to us, if we'll make the room to listen.